Getting to Kochi from Hampi was a little more difficult than we thought. However, it was a funny experience looking back at it now but at the time it was far from that!!
After dodging the ticket inspector for 2 trains, each 12hour journeys we were always going to get caught at some point!
On the first train we had a basic chair seat ticket what all the locals had but thought we would do what all the Indians' seemed to do and upgrade ourselves and try and claim some beds in the sleeper carriage.
Ofcourse this didn't work and we slowly lost our beds, so we thought we would upgrade ourselves again and moved to the Air Conditioned carriage thinking we could easily get beds there and no one would know!! That was until the train inspector caught us deciding which beds we were going to have (a bed each or share!)
Rachel managed to grab a bed, make it, get in it and quickly close the curtain before he even noticed she was there!!Me Sarah and Katrina were having a rather heated debate about him having 'compassion' and helping us out as we are good people! and it was midnight! but he was having none of it.
After coughing up he let us off with two beds. One minute he was telling me to leave and Sarah was having a bed, he then told me to get in the bed and go to sleep because it was late!...although our light wasn't allowed to be switched off because he was writing!! :S
As he was showing Katrina her bed he pulled back the curtain to tell her to get in it only to find Rachel sat there! luckily he didn't go mental and let us have 2 beds between the 4 of us.
When we arrived in Bangalore at 6am we planned to get the 6.15 train to Kerala but just missed it by 10minutes, if that...So we had to wait until 9.30pm for our next train. We queued up and this time got the last 2 tickets, so we had 2 beds guarenteed. Thinking this would be fine we had no worries and managed to put our bags in a cloakroom while we spent the day in Bangalore. The IT capital of India (which explained why in our Air conditioned carriage there were Chinese businessmen who at the time of the debate with the inspector was trying to explain to Sarah that she could stay with him in Beijing!) yet it took us forever to find an internet cafe!Finally we found a wi-fi cafe so that was good enough. We had a walk round the city and chilled out for the day ready for our next train, of which we had 2 tickets for the 4 of us.
Once we got on the train, who were we kidding, thinking it would go all smoothly...the inspector saw our tickets and wouldn't let us stay 2 per bed so told me to move. Sarah managed to hide under the sheet so the 3 girls were all safe. I had to wait next to the doors for over an hour with a nice stale whiff of wee!
I sneaked back in and luckily that was the end of that. no more long train journeys!! Pheewwww!!!



Although Hampi was a little bit out of the way and messed up our train routes it was definately worth it...but now we had arrived in Kochi...where we planned to head down to Alleppey to rent a houseboat for a couple of days. After searching the streets of Alleppey, one dodgy guy trying to sell us his houseboat which 1. he couldn't show us AND 2. he was standing under the sign saying "Only buy from Authorised Operators not touts"...clearly a bit special so we decided to decline his offer!

We managed to find a boat we liked at a price we also liked so booked it for the next morning. However we had to get the rickshaw to the boat at 5am because the rickshaw drivers were all taking part in a 'strike' and if they are seen driving around giving us lifts after 6am they are likely to get "stones thrown at them" we weren't worried about him getting hit by stones but more concerned about us 4 getting involved in these shenanigans, so 5am it was!
Once we got on the houseboat and set off at 6 o clock we went through the backwaters lined with palm trees and little villages all down the side of the canals
We cruised until 9 o clock where we pulled up and our chef cooked us breakfast and later lunch! sooooooo much food and so many different dishes! we were in paradise! Our own boat for the 4 of us for 2 days, our own chef, our own waiter as well as our own driver!.....PLUS the boat had a TV, DVD player and surround sound so we could watch films or listen to music all day!
Once we had lunch we set off until 5pm where we pulled up for the night. We had bought some Honey Bee brandy, which although wasn't as cheap as in Goa (£1.50 for a litre bottle) still wasn't bad between 4 of us! so we had tea, watched a film and then cracked out the cards and finally drank what we had all been craving for since Hampi!

When we woke up to our cooked breakfast, little did we know that what we had seen was just the start of what was to come. The 2nd day we went through much smaller canals, where there were a number of villages all in a row. Kids everywehere, women washing their clothes and the men in their kayaks fishing and trading on the water.
We pulled up for lunch where we were cooked fresh fish! 4 fish on a plate, so luckily the girls didn't really want any so I got to have 3...mission completed, I had been dying to try the fish since I had got here and in one meal I got to have 3 whole fish!! :) Once we had lunch me and Katrina decided we would jump in the river off the boat, and what an idea it was! We eventually got Sarah in after we assured her the fish wouldn't bite her feet! We got some awesome pictures but I managed to lose 1 of my earings...still definately worth it!...So now I have to roll up paper and put that in my ears until Thailand where I can get some more plugs. Maybe the paper look will catch on...after all the vest tan seemed to catch on, the Wes Brown look has also caught on (Indians dying their hair ginger), flares is a BIG BIG in thing so maybe paper earrings will be the next craze...

Our houseboat had to pull up early for the night because there was a massive storm coming our way! We were hoping to swim back in the river but with lightning flashing every 2 seconds, none of us were that keen to get in any more. Nevertheless our last night on the houseboat was a good'un. Although all the Honey Bee had gone we bought some apple vodka for the 2nd night and instead of cracking the cards out, we went a bit crazy and introduced the Canadians to the one and only game of Happy Families....pure classic....vodka and happy families. This was all going fine until a gang of cockroaches decided to try and take over the boat!...In came the driver with spray in his hand and the waiter with a brush in his hand to kill all the cockroaches from each room! As if they hadn't done enough for us already...we hardly lifted a finger!
Once the war had been won against the cockroaches, we managed to get our heads down.

Getting off the houseboat was interesting...we pulled up, got our bags and headed off the boat and before we knew it a rickshaw driver was already loading our bags into his boot telling us that we WERE going to alleppey beach and staying in a good guesthouse that he knew of! As we tried telling him we wanted to go to a different one he declined or doubled the price! We weren't taking this....we had been in India for 6 weeks, there was no way an indian was making a mug out of us. The debate got more and more heated, one thing lead to another and before we knew it, Katrina and Rachel were saying he was a bad person and that karma would bite him on the ass....not surprisingly, his next words were to get out of his rickshaw and find another one...our next words were "don't worry we will!!"...we like to think we won that argument especially when we were walking off down the road with our backpacks on blocking the road so the driver couldn't get his rickshaw through!...that had to give the win to us!

The plan now was to head to a cheap guesthouse for a night, and then make our way back to Kochi the next day and visit Fort Kochi. On our way to Fort Kochi me and Sarah thought of a great game to play whilst we were at the train station; how many Indian men can you find who don't have a moustache. In the whole station we counted 4 and in the station we arrived at, we found 3. Also we had made a rule up a long the way. If any guy was clearly trying to grow a moustache but was fortunate enough not to be able to grow one (like me!) then they couldn't be counted.
When we arrived to Fort Kochi it was awesome, so much nicer than the mainland, little tiny streets everywhere, a really relaxed atmosphere, no hassling and all these fishing nets (officially called Chinese fish nets) lining the coast, an awesome picture especially when the sun sets behind them too. This was our last stop in India and it was a good place to unwind. We plan to go to a beach on another island tomorrow and then rent bicycles and ride around the area and visit Jew Town the next. Thats another thing which is weird....there are a lot of Christians in Kerala, with most houses having a picture of either Jesus on the wall or the virgin Mary, but what gets me is that alongside this they then have a picture of Shiva, a Hindu god!...how can Christianity and Hinduism have anything in common!...beyond me

Hampi

After 10 days in Goa we thought we had better leave and go back into the real India...Goa was a state of amazing beaches and felt like we had left India behind, where we could relax, without all the chaos, bustling, and constant haggling with locals trying to sell us...rubbish!...whether it was a drum, a tiny Taj Mahal keyring, a wind up army man that crawls a long the floor or a huge balloon which is "very strong" as he smashes it into the ground as a demonstration!

Our taxi driver seemed to have a death wish, when taking us to the train station but we got there in 1 piece surprisingly and got the train to Hampi...8 hours long which was a small journey compared to our others (26hr, 14hr etc) but after around 4 hours had passed, we managed to attract a guy sitting on the top bunk, (who had originally shared my seat but got the message it was my seat and my seat only) licking his lips at Katrina...I dunno if that's how they pull over here...maybe it normally works, I don't know...



We got to Hampi and it was amazing, on a river, with ruins of an old Hindu Empire all set in a boulder-riden landscape covered in palm trees and banana trees.
You walk one way and your amongst the boulders, you walk the other way and you're amongst banana trees and palm trees with river estuaries running everywhwere....
The whole scenery was surreal..
The first day we all decided to rent bicycles and explore the ruins and the tracks all around Hampi. After reserving 3 pink bikes for the girls (although only 2 had a bell - and still no discount) and a flaming bike with bull horns for me...we set off on our adventure.
About 20 bottles of water and 300 pictures later we had all burnt our noses and were ready to head back before setting off the other way to find the 'main' temple which was a long the river.




The heat was sooooooo hot, it was mad. biking in 43'C heat, where we struggled to find any shaded areas and the electricity shut off every day for the evening...it made it impossible to cool down. Until on our last day we found a spot and just chilled out in the river! it was awesome!..although the Indians all in their tighty whities was a bit of an eye-sore to otherwise a perfect landscape!



That night we got the train to Bangalore which sounds all straight forward until we find out that the tickets are sold out and the only tickets we can buy are for general chairs...where all the indians cram on with their 200 bags per family! they were like chickens in a cage...so we decided we would try and find a few beds, but ofcourse with the trian fully booked we slowly found ourselves without any room!
In the end we got told their were spare beds in the Air-Conditioned rooms so made our way and found 4 beds!...perfect, until the conductor came a long asking for tickets, of which we didn't have!...luckily some Indian locals had a word with him and we managed to get 2 beds with 2 people in each! Somehow we got some sleep and arrived in Bangalore

Goa - Paradise!

Leaving Mumbai for Goa sounded pretty good, going from one extreme to the other, after walking around, touching shoulders with everyone it was that busy, to being on the beach sunbathing all day...heaven...and heaven it certainly was! This was what I pictured heaven to be and if this is still in India, heaven must be even better!

We arrived at the station and got a local bus, brim full of people (we felt like sardines)...very cosy...I was on the backseat with the ‘girls’ of the neighbourhood and Sarah was next to the slick guy playing it cool... looking at her every now and again!..Whilst singing along to the tunes...
The bus was kind and dropped us off only 3Km away from the beach telling us it was a 15minute walk...maybe if it was cold and we ran, but when it was boiling hot, each with a MASSIVE bag and Sarah with a blister equally as big on her foot!...it was a bit longer than their suggestion



Never mind, a few hours later we got there and found a Beach hut ‘on the beach’...you can’t see the beach but you can hear it. The huts were all in a horse-shoe shaped formation apart from ours was a bit out of it and in the corner...so the cheapest hut they had...still we couldn’t complain..£3.50 a night, a couple of pigs under the hut, piglets running around, chickens waking you up at silly o clock and a nice dog who follows us where ever we go...Sarah tells me to stroke him...I would place a large bet on him having fleas

As for the beach, it was paradise!...palm trees lining the beach, sea like a hot blue bath...bars along the top at 30p a beer in happy hour...and to top it off the sun went down on the beach as well...
Our first day was interesting, we walked up and down the beach and bumped into some girls we met in Mumbai so decided we would meet them later for some drinks the next night.
10 o clock the next day we got out, put our sunbeds in prime position of the sun, after buying fresh new towels and factor 20 Indian sun’block’....well...1 problem; it didn’t block anything! After a few hours we were burnt alive! I was anyway; Sarah was just a bit red....burnt.

That put our sunbathing on hold...the next two days we sat under a thatched umbrella and somehow I still got burnt again! Beyond just the burnt, red look...it was now a painful purple colour.
Apparently I should have still put suncream on when sitting in the shade...which was beyond me but Sarah had done it and wasn’t burnt so I couldn’t argue!
2 days later we started again, back out with our towels in the sun...prime position...bring it on sun....this time we could handle it, staying out until 5.15pm! It hit me, suncreams not for wimps, its actually pretty cool.
We went for a meal with Katrina and Rachel, to try out their new hotel’s restaurant...Sarah’s food was amazing, the girls’ food was also great...mine was disgusting; we put it down to me being ill, the reason why I threw it up. The waiter would come over and clear all the plates, apart from mine thinking I hadn’t finished so I felt bad and tried to eat it all up, and threw the whole lot up over the side of the chair next to me, and let their dog clear it up...felt pretty good after I have to admit!

Overall I think we can say Goa has been a success, we have survived the roads of India by renting a moped out for the day to see the beaches either side of the one we are staying at, the beer was cheap, they play premier league football, we have a hammock and a balcony, hear but not see the sea, we are actually past the burnt phase and getting brown, Sarah’s hair is getting blonder! And most of all she has stocked up on lip balm!!
With our tickets booked to go to Hampi we can leave Goa very happy brown bunnies...

P.S Oh and...Rach I hope you have noticed I am not writing in 3^rd person anymore!!

Slummin' in Mumbai

After deciding to change our route so we could see the wonders of Southern India, we caught our train from Varanasi and arrived in Mumbai 26 hours later. We had an Indian family look after us on the train, feeding us all their snacks, fruit, and even buying us chai!...their little kid was a little brat though...After shaking our hands and saying hello to us he then turned into this annoying little sh*t hitting everyone and pinching Sarah’s arm...until his mum gave him a proper backhand around his chops!...one of those slaps where they sound awesome as she caught him just right!
Although she would then go and give him a cuddle, he’d then hit her and she’d smack him again....it went on the whole 26 hours...the kid - Manoo wasn’t understanding the difference between right and wrong...Just to top that, his dad would hit him in the face and he’d laugh!

We arrived in Mumbai the following day at 12.30pm...hardly slept as another guy was snoring all night...SO loud! It turned out the Guesthouse we planned on staying in wasn’t there anymore so we got a room just round the corner which was a box....we could hardly move in it.
When we checked in the guy offered us a chance to be in a Bollywood film as Extras and we would get paid, free food and chai! 25 foreigners were needed as the film was based on San Francisco.
We later decided we would do it for a laugh, so 8.30am the next morning, a guy comes to pick us all up and we get sat in this tent!..after meeting everyone they one by one bought a costume in for each person to wear...girls first...Sarah’s was a nice frilly number with see-through bits, however the bonus was the jewellery was built in..with a necklace attached to the top!...genius
Dom thought he had got off lightly when he just had to wear a shirt and jeans...Until he got called out and given a waiter’s costume...bow tie, waistcoat, trousers, shirt and these horrible shoes!
It all seemed very budget until they then brought in all the equipment and 2 of Bollywood’s biggest stars were in it!...the Actress Briyancia Chopra (former miss world) and the actor Zayed Khan!
As they recorded it we got told what they wanted us to do...Dom to walk on and put a plate of food on the table, and take another tables order and then walk off....Sarah to sit on the sofa opposite the actors pretending to talk to some others...after about 200000 takes of each shot we were done!

All us extras went to Leopold’s bar to celebrate with a tower of beer...a beer well earned!
Apparently the film is to be aired in America in August!
The next day we arranged with two Canadian girls (also Extras) to go to Elephanta Island to see the 3 headed Shiva carving in some caves.
We had been warned about the monkeys but they were mad...The girls had some oranges and the monkeys just growled at them until a local guy was saying “give them your orange!!”...so that hit us, the Monkeys rule this island and what they say goes! Another cave was weird as it was full of donkeys...some guy said if we go into the cave with all the donkeys then it was good luck! So....we did it!
Although one donkey wasn’t having too much luck, he seemed to be stuck on a ledge and couldn’t get down...after Sarah telling me to help it, I decided maybe he wants to be there and we left.

With our train tickets all booked for Goa tomorrow night, we went into the central area of Mumbai....it was insane!! Absolute chaos!...we lasted about half an hour until it was starting to craze us, but we still haven’t found the slums....(further up in North Mumbai)
Tomorrow we plan to travel around that area and see how the kids roll in their shanty houses and rubbish tips...should be good....

P.S - 1 more night and we’ll be laying on the beaches of Goa J

The U-Turn!!......Goa

DOMS BIRTHDAYYY...After a morning boat ride...5am start...which was amazing to watch the sun come up over the Ganges whilst all the Indian’s come out and do their morning ritual. Miss Webb and Miss Fray I put a lotus flower in the Ganges for good luck and good karma for you both! :)
A few hours later after going back to bed, we treated ourselves to a Special and a Continental Breakfast...very tasty!
We made an aim to go find some shops, get some water from our lil’ mate and go see the cobra man.



We got our drink first, must have been his day off and made our way to the shops. After being branded a ‘Liar’ for apparently saying we would look in his shoddy little silk shop and then walking straight past it, Sarah found what she was looking for...trying to get a bargain we left unsuccessful...his loss, BUT......big but........we stumbled upon the Golden Temple!...it sounds better than it is, probably because non-hindus are not allowed within 20metres of the entrance, and its covered with army men with big proper real guns! Nevertheless we had found it...After Dom getting called to sit down with the Police and then them fire questions...”you want to go to the Golden Temple?””is that your wife?” “where you go?”, Dom clearly dropped a load and replied with “no no, we just go market...that way yes?” we then never spoke about the Golden temple until we were safe and back in our Hotel room...door locked

We then found the cobra man who we will put a picture up of just because he’s a hero, sat in the shade with 2 cobras in pots and another snake in a satchel! As you do...we got a few snaps and after being told to only pay him 5-10rupees we thought we would be kind and give him 20....but OOHHHH NO that was not enough for 2 photos with 2 different snakes...oooohh nooo....it ended up with Dom standing there with his 20rupees and about 4 Indian guys trying to tell him that it’s not enough...Sarah happened to have started to walk off and turned around and said, “that’s all we have so do you want it or not?20rupees or 0rupees!?” sadly it didn’t phase him so we offered 25...still not phased so 50rupees it was...

GOA

Can you actually believe that I have decided to stay in India for a ‘couple’ more weeks! After arriving in Delhi and walking up and down piss alley I thought the sooner I get away from India the better!
Saying that though...since we’ve left Delhi the smell has died down a bit...whether that’s because we get an overall stench from the river which overpowers the smell or the fact the locals are having poos’ off the edge of steps and a goat is waiting at the landing point for a snack, or even the fact that there are bodies being burnt everyday 24/7 I haven’t quite put my finger on it as of yet...So maybe not for the better! Haha...Just to clear it up, although whatever it is that’s causing the funky smells, I am lovin’ India, especially the 42’C weather and the fact that now we could stay in India as well as be on the beach! But most of all (and I speak for Dom as well) we are happy that we are slowly on our way to laying a good old fashioned English Log....yes, Delhi Belly is definitely not cool! And old news wayyyy behind us now! ***

After a very lengthy stay at Hotel Elvis...run by the Elvis brothers, who are all massive chubby Buddha-like blokes...LaLa, Haroon and the ‘other chubby brother’...their little cleaner boy...who thinks he’s a Ronaldo look-a-like...and Papu.... who I have to say is the most AMAZING cook in the whole wide world...I have never tasted food that good...Vegetable Burgers...Yummyyy!!
Sad to say it’s got to the point where we eat there for breakfast...lunch...and tea...and whenever we eat anywhere else we just slate it – ‘This is not as good as Papu’s food’...’Papu’s food doesn’t taste this bad’...we just thought we should venture out of Elvis so we’re not ‘sado’s’ that are always on the rooftop!!!...Never again will we eat somewhere else now, after the soggy, doughy spring roll from Ganga Fuji which looked more like a Cornish pasty than it did a spring roll...give them credit though – they got the shape right...and it was very nearly a roll...they just slipped up with using the pastry option as well as the filling...

So it was a Friday afternoon and we were doing our daily walk along the river...and we...well Dom... Thought...should we really leave India after only 2weeks...bearing in mind our Visa runs out on Aug 10...2010!!...
He had the almost...genius idea...best I’ve ever heard from his mouth...”shall we go to the beaches for a few weeks...maybe Goa?”...my eyes lit up when I heard the word. I have always wanted to go, but I’ve always said that I want to do it properly...no expense spared. After thinking...am I ever really going to come back to India? I thought probably not...next stop is the Maldives after travelling for me...so there it was, the decision was made....Goa is out next stop....white sandy beaches, palm trees...beach huts, no more trousers and perfect beachy weather!...what more could I ask for?...seems too good to be true!!

Straight to the internet we went...flight search...with no cheap flights...we kinda gave up...but Dom not one to give up when he has a cracking idea...TRAIN!!!
The thought of a train across the other side of India...we later found out it would be a whopping 30-35+ hours...eeek! However; Goa at the other side - DEFINATLEY worth it. Well not exactly...we have to go to Mumbai on the way and then another train to Goa...but none the less we will eventually be in Goa!

So now after a longgg....very very long stay, a total of 10days...at Elvis Guest house, it was time for us to go out and explore the slums of Mumbai, Bollywood and more importantly the Goan beaches of India....and I cannot wait....BIKINI time!!!!

**P.S Can I just add that Dom wrote the bit about the Poo; although I’m not denying that this is true.
**P.P.S. Can I also just add that flares are definitely not cool...and that according to Locals we are classed as Gipsy’s as we travel around a lot...it’s very selfish of us!!...Gee Thanks!